Ok, that's not fair. I've never actually watched any porn. But I did see Lady Chatterley's Lover tonight (the new, french adaptation), and that was probably close enough.

Is it the French? Is that it--- that's just the way they make movies? I remember watching (being subjected to?) this french movie one time- "Hiroshima, mon amour" it was called, perhaps you have heard of it. The frame story was just that this married French woman (why do they always have to be married?) is having sex with this Japanese guy.
Yeah, they spend a large part of the movie on that.

It's just after the war and she's come to Hiroshima to make a film about peace.
While this is taking place, she starts remembering her first love, a German soldier she fell in the sack love with during the occupation. Needless to say, this wasn't really good for her "La Resistance" street cred. There are a lot of wheat fields and some snow and quite a lot of bad editing. Yet another thing that that film had in common with this one, as it happens.

But the whole time we're looking at snow on poor quality film and wondering why we should sympathize with some woman sleeping with The Enemy (I bet she can't even speak German!), these two are having teh sex, very SLOOOOWLY, and man is it BORING. For the life of me I have no memory of how it ends. The movie, I mean.


During the fine film I just finished watching, they don't even have an intervening German. It's just "look at all the plants" and then SEX! and then "regard, the leaves on the trees" and then SEX!!! and then "behold, she walks through a field of flowers", etc, etc. If the plants were supposed to be some sort of innuendo or euphemism, I think they forgot they were supposed to *substitute* them rather than juxtapose them. Ok, so it got a little more interesting around the end when they finally fell in love. (Isn't that supposed to go the other way around?)

Anyway, my two friends and I spent the whole movie snickering.

Mostly because of the extremely awkward editing. I swear.

The only thing the french can teach you is how to surrender.
» Dilated on 2007-07-17 11:24:49

btw, Juxtapose is a great word.
» Dilated on 2007-07-17 11:25:25

Sounds
darn stupid to me...
» Xboyz on 2007-07-18 01:48:06

Heh, yeah. I take french at school but the movies they show in class are terrible. I guess it's just a general thing. :P
» randomjunk on 2007-07-18 04:36:28

I love bad movies like that, hehe.
When you watch them with a lot of friends and approach them as if they were unintentional comedies, they're hilarious.

That's how I got through the acting in Star Wars 3. That movie left me and my friends laughing hysterically for the next 3 days.
» ManOfDarkSunglasses on 2007-07-18 09:49:05

lol @ all the sx scenes. Sounds like they made the movie as some sort of cover for the sx. :P
» frostbitten on 2007-07-18 01:58:19

lol. We watched a chinese movie just like that. Except she was a prostitute... and you were just supposed to feel sorry for her, but just goes to show, it isn't just the french!
» jinyu on 2007-07-18 11:46:36

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